I get TSM regards to less craving over time, however in order to break my own habit, which is drinking every night. Hopefully the time will come when I start to get AF days. My question is in the experience of others, does this happen automatically or do I take the plunge when my craving is less and force a AF day.

Also

If I take a Nalmefene one hour before but don't drink is this good or bad, should I drink come what may in order to follow TSM correctly?

Since you're ultimately trying to achieve markedly reduced drinking anyway, AF days Will be part of that, and are really not as big a deal as they seem.

Like anything, you become used to it over time, and for most, AF days become the norm, and drinking days become the outliers.

Experiences vary widely. If you indeed drink every night, forcing yourself to go AF on occasion might be helpful in reintroducing your body to endorphins.

Don't feel guilty about taking nal and drinking if you still have strong cravings, though. "Forcing" the AF days should be more about breaking the habit of drinking than suppressing a craving that will simply return if not extinguished.



It's fine if that happens occasionally--in fact, it's a good thing if you're able to resist drinking. Just try not to make a habit of it, since you miss out on the beneficial effects of reinforcing positive behaviors. Don't take the pill unless you're fairly certain that you'll be drinking in an hour.

Thank you both for replying, since I'm an habitual drinker with a very set routine over many years I'm just going to see what happens. It's a long shot because I always have my 1st drink with 6pm news (I can see how sad this is) however it's a kind of happy rut in a way. Have 4/5 drinks over four hours. Sleep until early hours and restless after that and wake up groggy.

It's a routine so set in my bones that if I don't take the Nal 1 hour before I will bring on the cravings subconsciously anyway.

Do I wait for TSM to work or force a AF day by not taking Nal and suffering the cravings a bit? It a real back to basic question for me, from what I've read; You take the pill one hour before and within 3/6 months bingo. Or do you need to to more than be that Passive. It's a big question for me. I will hold by breath for six months if it would work but the craving to breath just won't allow me to do it.

Well, how about disrupting the routine in other ways? Go out and see a movie instead of watching the news. If the cravings get bad you can always take the pill, duck out and crash in front of the TV a little later than usual.

My 2 cents...Your craving and desire to drink should diminish with time. When they diminish, your habitual behavior of drinking diminishes. There is no benefit in forcing af days at first. Allow the extinction process to mature naturally. Once the craving are gone but the habit still persist. Your half way home. Stay true to the protocol, your habits will diminish just as your craving did. I think giving TSM a 6 month window in which you are fully compliant, monitoring your weekly consumption and craving is a good start. It's a small price to pay for the freedom that is possible. Don't over think this. The nal does all the work. You just need to trust the science and keep the course. If at a later date you feel compelled to have af days once the addiction is broken but habit isn't. Go for it, you have nothing to loose. If the af days become do-able and enjoyable, that's great. If not, just go back to the Golden rule and allow more time to past. The safety net of the nal will always be there to catch you and put you back on course. Imho, there is no way your current mind could possible understand what's about to take place. It has worries and concerns that aren't justified. Just relax, take a pill 1 hour before drinking. Drink like normal. It's that easy.

You're only just starting. Give it time to work. You'll probably have AF days naturally as the addiction cracks and then crumbles. A few people don't, hence the occasional suggestion to "force" once, but that actually means just consciously deciding to try an AF day. TSM doesn't require you to battle actual cravings, and in fact you shouldn't battle them -- the heart of the method is to take the pill and drink.

This will make more sense after you have a couple of months of progress. Most of the stuff I worried about at first sounded silly once I was partly cured.

Thank you all once again.

Epenthesis I'm not really a movie person but I get your suggestion about breaking the habitual side as well.

PlantprO and Melissa both your posts make sense, overthinking a lifelong trait I'm afraid. I couldn't cross the road without rationalising every option. "Is the traffic lights too far, what if I use the underpass except I may get mugged. Ok Ill just cross here but it is a busy road"

Your replies have helped enormously and from someone who is just starting out. I very much needed to be reminded that TSM has a scientific basis and it is not necessary to force cold turkey. That's the hardest thing to keep in mind when I've spent half a lifetime trying to quit whilst fighting the cravings.

Or do you need to to more than be that Passive. It's a big question for me.

That's definitely become a top three most debated question. It's really just hypothetical as there is no way to really define / delineate what exactly "passive" is, or "force," or even a "craving." This is all very subtle when experienced by the self. I'm reminded of a great scene in my all-time favorite movie, The Last Samurai, where Tom Cruise tries to spend his first night without getting drunk. When I saw the movie, in the height of my addiction, I was quite moved by the whole thing. I could relate.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IdxNXRRwkM

I did my first AF night (after about, I guess, 9-10 years) on my first week of TSM. It was exactly NOTHING like the Tom Cruise scene. Yes, it took me awhile to go to sleep at first, but it wasn't unpleasant -- of course, I didn't have any withdrawal symptoms or anything like that.

Anyway, yes, don't overthink this whole thing. If AF nights fill you with (irrational) fear, wait a week or two or three. One of the things I like about TSM is how much your thoughts and rationalizations change over time. So, do your thing for a month or so, look back, and you'll likely see how you've changed -- even if it's just a little. Do it for six months, and you'll likely see bigger changes, etc... Right now, your "Addictive Voice" has a hold on you and is really stressing about the idea of going alcohol free (www.rationalrecovery.com). It's just your subconscious -- it's weird, I know, but your own brain has a part of it that wants to keep getting the alcohol on a regular basis; it will try to scare you, intimidate you, etc... to make you compliant to its retarded, self-defeating desires.