As everyone knows I consider myself cured. Recently however I'm experiencing a few worrying spikes. To explain the background I was concentrating on a seriously mega project in my life for the last 6 months, so serious that not drinking was generally a good thing which helped and so I rarely drank during this time. I might have 1 glass of wine every 2 weeks, always took my Nal 1 hour beforehand and never drank without it.

Now the pressure is off, I can relax and I'm finding when I'm drinking I want to get drunk and I am doing. Out of the last 4 times I've drank alcohol it's been 3/4 to a full bottle of wine(, only once did I just have a pint of beer and stop at that.

I'm curious and my reasoning is that this change in my life where all pressure is off is creating a new trigger?and I'm experiencing spikes again?

Just to be clear I am not craving alcohol, those feelings have not returned in the slightest. When I don't drink I am fine, but when I do well I'm wanting to hammer it.

This level of drinking is also still only 1/3 - 1/2 of the amount I would drink prior to TSM when it would always be at least 2 if not 3 bottles of wine(20-30 UK units) before I'd pass out.

These spikes are getting me down, nagging voice says TSM has stopped working for me. Has anyone else had this occur some way down the line?

Hey UK:

Finishing a big project can be a trigger for all kinds of feelings. Some people even get depressed once the strain is off.

As for your dilemma, I seem to remember reading posts from some cured/controlled people who experienced odd patterns of changed drinking. But it's particularly puzzling to me that you go from 0 to 60 (as we say here in the States) but don't have cravings.

I have a hunch that if/when I regain control I'm still going to need to use moderation techniques. But that's because I have a hard time imagining the indifference some people report! But maybe I'll get there too.

Anyway, I wouldn't worry too much that TSM is failing. The fact that you don't have cravings and that your drinking is so much under control is clear proof it works for you.

Thanks Tiller. I think I need to exert some more control myself and stop relying on the Nal to do it for me.

Yes I have been depressed, also having problems with binge eating again. Hoping NAl and me working together can sort it all out!

Hi UKBlond! Please be careful!! You've done so well, don't let your old patterns sneak up on you for the same old reasons. I find I can always find a reason to drink - I'm happy - yes. I'm upset - yes. I'm pissed off at DH - yes. I'm lonely - yes. It's a party and I'll feel relaxed and fit in if I have a drink - yes.

Control is key, as you've said. If your binge eating is coming back too, you have to really be vigilant and take a good look at what's going on - be it the end of the project or the start of a boring period. Hope you keep posting so we'll know how things are going.

Thanks Revert, I don't think the spikes have been all that bad really but I do need to reign it in. Last week I drank on 2 occasions and had approximately 8 units in 7 days. This week I've had 7 units already (drank on two occasions) but don't plan on drinking again until the weekend.

I have continued take Naltrexone whenever I drink through all of this and not once have a drank alcohol without it.

Morning UK, it certainly is an odd thing, this TSM, because even though the naltrexone helps us "reset" our brains and all that, the hand still reaches for the bottle - that pattern may be "erased" as it's described in the book, but the other patterns of our lives still remain.

I guess that's why I'm back after being "cured." I think my brain pattern was fixed but I continued to drink, and then to drink without the naltrexone, because of all the other stuff going on in my life. I don't know if this will ever get better for me. So I've simply re-created the brain patterns and have to start all over again!

The goal I guess that makes the most sense, now that I have abandoned abstinence as impractical for me, is to drink when it's "appropriate" but not every night because of boredom/loneliness/anxiety/stress/or any other reaction to what's happening in my life. I guess that would be drinking like a "normal" drinker.

Is this possible for someone like me who has been a major drunk, then a "controlled" alcoholic for many years? I hope so. I live in the real world. My DH likes to drink, so do my friends and neighbours - mostly they drink appropriately. I'm just hoping if I really give naltrexone a proper try this time - and keep at it without fail - that I too can drink like that - or at least with some effort learn to drink more "appropriately."

From what i have read of your posts that's what you had - but now you feel a bit of a pull back to what you used to do. Each of us is different so I can't say what is causing this but just my own opinion is that your other "patterns" are still there. And if you drank from stress before, you are drinking for some other "pattern" reason now. It takes so much work to root out all these insidious patterns and eradicate them!! But be calm, don't be anxious over this as that will set you up to drinking more.

Don't know if any of this makes sense - I'm more babbling to get all this straight in my own head!!!!

Just wanted to report a few things;

Eating binges have increased, but I'm taking 50mg Nal and waiting the hour before partaking. Got drunk once this week, approx 10-12 units. No other alcohol drinking or cravings, just wanted a bit of escape from worries. Have also had an eating binge which specifically involved me being sick afterwards.

Units of alcohol for the week 13 or 14, which is within UK recommended drinking limits. Prior to TSM I would drink 20-30 units in one day between 1-3 times a week.

Hey UK:

I obviously can't report from the other side like you can because I'm not there yet. I can see why you would worry. But I would observe that if the cravings aren't there than TSM must still be working. Cravings, after all, are the hardest part for most people. Were they hard for you before the TSM worked?

It sounds to me like a consistent moderation plan would help when you DO drink. I have never been convinced that TSM sets all people totally free. Some are. Some just have to decide never to drink and TSM helps them get there. Some have to work (at some level) to keep from drinking too much when they do drink. For others control means harm reduction but not the liberation they sought.

Your theory about needing to deal with a new trigger makes sense to me. The really does seem like a longer-term and more complex process than the book/FAQ would suggest. We learn more as time elapses.

Wishing you best!

I agree that cravings, and brain`s learned behavior aren`t the only reasons we drink and we want to get drunk sometimes. Maybe the brain forgets through extinction, but we don`t. That`s why nal by itself is not enough in some cases and we need therapy, or other support. I think the important thing is not to give up nal in any case, and use other control methods when we feel stressed. And this comes from a guy who is considering to put his name under the `cured` list thanks to tsm.

All last week I was fine with eating and drinking. No alcohol then had a stressful few days - evening of first I had a couple of medium glasses of wine, went to bed happy no problem. No cravings carried on as usual. Then had a night out at the weekend, meeting new people, new situation got a bit (well very drunk), for the first time in a long time was sick. I haven't a clue how much I drank and I did go into blackout. I'd estimate 15 units. I took 50mg Nal on each occasion and waited the full hour.

Several things to note;

I did not want to carry on drinking the next morning
I have had no cravings for alcohol at all
I just wanted to let my hair down and get tipsy in company

Am I in denial?

I don't know, I do know I still do not have the daily obsession with alcohol BUT there is still residue of something there.

Do I chose abstenance?

I don't know because in the past that has made me worse.

A close friend knows what happened, he hasn't said anything and I think (and hope) he would if he truly was worried.

I'm not worried BUT I don't want to be like I was this weekend again, so am a little confused. There were consequences of this drinking episode but thankfully nothing serious (being ill just made things difficult for a few hours but I think it's important to recognise it anyway).

I'm not wanting anyone to get disheartened by this, I know many think I'm some sort of 'rock'. This is just my experience and I don't think TSM fixes everything, but it does help massively and this is also why I've started seeing a counsellor again - someone who's known me on and off from way back before TSM. The counsellor has seen massive change in me so something is definitely happening.