Hi Duddy,
It's not an easy position to be in and you have a very difficult decision to make. There aren't many people on here who are abstinent when they start TSM but there was someone recently called bottomsup was asking a similar question to yours. This is a link to the posts which might be helpful.

viewtopic.php?f=17&t=3586

Well I guess Nal is not working for me well enough. I think it is not worth the risk for anybody sober for a longer period of time. It does not take the relaxed feeling away from drinking and I just lost a few days out of my life taking Nal and drinking way to much. Feel like crap today I will not drink tonight and I hope never again. I guess one day at the time is the way to go. Hard but that's the truth for me.
Good luck to all of you.

Thanks for telling us, erk. We can all learn that way.

I wonder if you're one of the 10% with an addiction outside the standard opioid receptor addiction. I wonder that because you described the relaxed feeling, and the euphoria is always what appealed to me. Nal blocks the latter but not the former.

Good luck to you, erk.

Dear Melisa, when you said cured, what do you mean? No desire, no pleasure, control over how much you drink. I just wonder what does it mean to you. How much and how often you drank before, how many years..... So many questions.
Thanks erk

I am not Melissa, but for an idea of where she has come from, check out her well-written roller-coaster ride.