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 Post subject: Therapy and TSM?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 05, 2015 1:52 pm 
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Joined: Sun Feb 02, 2014 11:56 am
Posts: 2
After some success early last year with Nal and TSM (I could actually relax and enjoy life for a while) my husband inexplicably stopped taking it and we are back to square one. His TSM was under my direction, though, because he would not read the book. He only had one foot in the door to this treatment; his heart was not completely in it. This was a shame, because he felt it working, it even amazed him, so I never understood (why do I try) why he stopped. I think he might be ready to try again, but if he chooses TSM, I really think he'd benefit from some concurrent therapy, namely cognitive behavioral therapy, a one-on-one with someone versed in TSM. Anyone have experience with this? How or where do you look for such a professional? I know I can't control him, but why won't he read the book? I told him at least read Chapters 5-10, that would suffice. So frustrating. :(


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 Post subject: Re: Therapy and TSM?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 05, 2015 4:02 pm 
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Joined: Mon Sep 14, 2015 3:58 pm
Posts: 208
Location: Minnesota
You should check out the Sinclair Method Doctors thread on this board. Maybe you'll find someone in your area that could not only manage his nal treatment, but recommend/provide CBT treatment as well.

I live in the Minneapolis/St. Paul area and there is an addiction clinic that utilizes a multifaceted, science-based approach to treatment. It's called Alltyr, just in case you're in the area.

_________________
Started TSM 9/25/15
pre TSM 25-30ish/week and rare AF - standard US drinks

MONTH 1: 25 wk/ .5 AF avg
MONTH 2: 20 wk/ 1 AF avg
MONTH 3: 21.5 wk/ .75 AF avg
Week 13: 21.5/0 AF
Week 14: 25/0 AF
Day 1: 1.5
Day 2: 4
Day 3: .5


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 Post subject: Re: Therapy and TSM?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 05, 2015 4:10 pm 
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Joined: Fri Nov 21, 2014 2:56 pm
Posts: 481
Location: London, UK
there is a list of Doctors sympathetic to TSM who might be able to point you in the right direction here:

http://www.cthreefoundation.org/find-a-physician.html#.VhL05vlVikq

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tracking on 1st post of my progress thread


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 Post subject: Re: Therapy and TSM?
PostPosted: Mon Oct 05, 2015 5:37 pm 
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Joined: Fri May 09, 2014 10:08 am
Posts: 438
If he's not willing to read the book or take the medication, sounds like he is unwilling to do it.

Even for those that read the book religiously, and put a lot of effort into it, it is still not an easy road.

I know there's a clinic in Florida and also in Madison Wisconsin,that are TSM friendly, possibly others. Unfortunately, , almost all traditional therapy centers focus on abstinence and the 12 steps. I suspect it would take a bit of googling to find one.

Even if you found a therapist, the minimum prerequisite would be to read the book and take the medication. Perhaps a therapist could go into the deeper issues as to what he really wants


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 Post subject: Re: Therapy and TSM?
PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2015 6:19 pm 
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Joined: Sun Mar 16, 2014 5:02 am
Posts: 242
Drinking is fun. Until it isn't. If it is still fun, TSM is not an option. No one will persuade him otherwise.

One day, drinking won't be fun any longer. He has to get there on his own though. We can all see how much easier it would be to get off that road now, -but he cannot. It's frustrating as all hell, but also as immutable as hell.

No sense banging your head against the wall.

Sorry.

_________________
Began: March 2014
Cured: August 2014


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 Post subject: Re: Therapy and TSM?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 07, 2015 12:53 am 
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Joined: Fri Jul 24, 2015 6:49 am
Posts: 118
I am so sorry to hear that your man is not into TSM anymore. I wander if you might not be doing too much work instead of him. I remember having a boyfriend years ago who was a binge drinker and after one of the most horrible binges when he was a total mess, I called an addiction clinic asking them if I can bring him there to start a treatment and a nice doctor told me that sadly, he needs to ask to be taken there. I then realized that it was all the time my idea that he needs treatment and when he was in crisis he agreed with it, but when he sobered up he did not do much to pursue it. He might go to a therapist a few times, but then stopped. Finally, I realized that I cannot pull someone out of addiction and left the guy. You might need to step back at the moment and see if your husband does some work on his problem by himself.

_________________
pre TSM 40-50 UK U
TSM start 17.7. 2015

M 1, 19 U avg, 8 AF per month
M 2, 24 U, 5 AF
M 3, 20 U, 11 AF
M 4, 28,5 U, 2 AF
M 5, 21 U, 9 AF
M 6, 27 U, 2 AF
M 7, 27,5 U, 1 AF
M 8, 30 U, 2 AF
M 9, 20 U, 8 AF
M 10, 20 U, 5 AF
M 11, 25 U, 1 AF


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 Post subject: Re: Therapy and TSM?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 07, 2015 8:41 am 
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Joined: Thu Sep 24, 2015 2:42 pm
Posts: 51
HopefulSpouse wrote:
After some success early last year with Nal and TSM (I could actually relax and enjoy life for a while) my husband inexplicably stopped taking it and we are back to square one. His TSM was under my direction, though, because he would not read the book. He only had one foot in the door to this treatment; his heart was not completely in it. This was a shame, because he felt it working, it even amazed him, so I never understood (why do I try) why he stopped. I think he might be ready to try again, but if he chooses TSM, I really think he'd benefit from some concurrent therapy, namely cognitive behavioral therapy, a one-on-one with someone versed in TSM. Anyone have experience with this? How or where do you look for such a professional? I know I can't control him, but why won't he read the book? I told him at least read Chapters 5-10, that would suffice. So frustrating. :(

In what specific ways are you letting him own the consequences of his drinking behavior? If you're cushioning the fall, where's his incentive to change? I'm not saying you are, I'm just asking, since I didn't see you discuss that before.

_________________
Mr. ND started TSM: 5/16/2015
Pre-nal avg. US std. unit drinks/day: 7.5
4.3/1 AF, 6.5, 5.8/1 AF, 9.6, NT, 7.2, NT,
NT, NT, NT, NT, 5.5/2 AF, 11, 8.1, 6.1,
4.6, 3.5, 2.8/1 AF, 3, 3.30, 3.2, 1.8/1 AF,
2.1/2 AF, 1.7/1


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 Post subject: Re: Therapy and TSM?
PostPosted: Sun Feb 28, 2016 12:57 pm 
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Joined: Fri Feb 05, 2016 2:58 pm
Posts: 46
My husband and I both have drinking problems. I will very cautiously say that I MAY have mine under control with TSM. (Starting week 4 and now on a full dose and have already cut my intake in half!)

My husband, however, has another problem. He's a treatment resistant, bipolar with depression only. And he's been using alcohol for years as the only thing that 'works'. He is very intelligent and fully understands that alcohol is a depressive and that after the rise of spirits from the drinking, so comes the fall. In short, he knows it's making his depression even worse in the long run. But the reward he gets -- that temporary erasure of depression that lasts for the 3-5 or longer hours he's drinking -- is just too great.

I am pushing hard to get him into weekly therapy sessions with a Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Behaviorial Therapist. It is my hope that if this type of treatment can teach him other techniques that will help alleviate his depressive symptoms, THEN, he will be more ready and receptive to addressing the alcohol issues.

I will post on his progress once I get him into therapy. Which won't be until he comes out of his next Blue State and has the energy to do the work required for this kind of therapy. Perhaps it will help someone else with a similar problem -- either for themselves or their spouse.

Have you considered that your husband, like mine, might have some other underlying condition that might need to be treated first before you turn to the alcohol issue?


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 Post subject: Re: Therapy and TSM?
PostPosted: Sun Feb 28, 2016 1:31 pm 
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Joined: Sun Dec 06, 2015 11:28 pm
Posts: 1643
T.O., in the meantime he might like to read The Upward Spiral by Alex Korb. Favorable reviews on Amazon and Goodreads, appeals to my technical bent. Still working my way through it, but I like it so far.


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 Post subject: Re: Therapy and TSM?
PostPosted: Mon Feb 29, 2016 7:47 am 
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Joined: Wed Jul 15, 2015 9:35 pm
Posts: 1429
T.O.,

My heart goes out to, for my father and sister were bipolar without mania and now my youngest is suffering from the same illness. I was lucky to find a good psychiatrist (oddly has bipolar with mania) to help my son (the meds other doctors put him on just made him sleep and more depressed), but my father and sister suffered. His psychiatrist helped with his meds to be able to help him find a balance and I can honestly say it does helps him and his spirits are up most of the time. My father dealt with his depression with alcohol, and my sister dealt with her depression with her Oxycodone (or any other pain pill), and both of them refused to admit that they had an issue or needed help.

I do hope that your husband goes to therapy sessions, and I hope that he finds a healthier "fix".

I am excited to read about his progress.

And your progress sounds amazing...4 week and intake cut in half...truly amazing!

Keep posting,

Jaba


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