UPDATE – CURED – 6 MONTH CHECK-IN

Long overdue for an update here and nothing but good news! Even if this worked during my early stages of investigation I was most skeptical of the declaration of being ‘cured’. It seemed to carry too much weight. And that it required lifetime pill ingestion … Now that I’m here I’m indeed cured. I’ve been having (1) drink approx. every (30) days for the past four months. I have cultivated true indifference to this substance that gave me so much trouble. I can take it or leave it. Bottles gather dust and beer gets pushed to the back of the fridge. Unthinkable! Psychologically I feel phenomenal. I can’t remember ever feeling so good. So normal. And I credit this partially too to seeing a psychiatrist and reevaluating some things I had been prescribed thus eliminating them. I’m glad I incorporated a psychiatrist/doctor who does talk therapy (hard to find these days or financially exclusive) into this process. I highly recommend it. It proved to be the icing on cake.

While I had reported no buzz I feel compelled to clarify that a scotch for instance will hit me just a bit, just enough. It’s actually pretty cool. There’s still pleasure left. I’m really not a huge fan of drinking on Naltrexone, which others have reported. But I’m still figuring out where I entirely stand in that regard. As I have been feeling virtually no inclination but for a novel glass of something once a month, the distance between doses is a true reintroduction of Naltrexone into my system each time. I didn’t feel I had many side effects at launch time and I’m not sure I’d call it that now. What’s happening is if I’m eating it disturbs my appetite some. It either simply kills it where I pick at things and end up with a doggie bag or in one instance now queered me on chicken wings for about a month. I’d just think about wings, associate them with this sort of ‘off’ feeling in my abdominal area and therein cringe a little. It’s as if I have accidentally gone through some aversion therapy. It happened briefly with something else too that now escapes me. All in all it’s not a big deal just peculiar. I’ve read of people reducing their NAL dose after extinction. I’m tempted to try it, but at the same time don’t want to risk ever experiencing cravings again. I just wonder if 25mg would feel more comfortable all around. We’ll see. Oh, and I've lost 20lbs...

AA. I feel like I made it out just in time. While I credit it with allowing me a support system, sober time and thus a clear mind where I was capable of approaching TSM I have some hostility to it. With TSM I also began reading a lot more on addiction. AA fosters no investigation. I’d argue it’s anti-intellectual. One of their catch phrases – your best thinking got you here- sums it up. Don’t question anything. The more I read the more I feel the nuts and bolts of it are hugely unhealthy. There’s plenty of resources on the matter and I’m not here to malign AA. It however validates my instincts from the moment I first walked in and promptly walked out six years ago - something’s off about this and these people are weird. Ha! I got weird. It sure would have been nice to know about TSM 6 years ago. I feel like I was done a huge disservice which is why I spend time trying to spread awareness of TSM.

Anyway, I’m free! So is my mother.

Thank you Dr. Sinclair, Dr. Espaka and Claudia Christian. You have changed/saved my life.

Progress thread:
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4417

An amazing story and an impressive victory, Bardo! Glad to hear your mom was cured too, what a bonus! Congratulations, sir!

That is a soaring success Bardo. Enjoy your freedom from the chains of alcoholism. I think you will find it most interesting and refreshing living life as a sober man.

Thank you both.

I'm past this sober/not sober dualistic trapping. I already carried the 'sober' cross for just short of a year. Like any normal person I'll just be. Organically and naturally. That's what's great about extinction.

Nailed it!

great to hear your report. I think what continues to blow me is my INDIFFERENCE to AL now. just doesn't seem that important to me....

Bardo, I remember how frightened I was for you when you first posted. I can't tell you how thrilled I am to read this update.

-Dee

What a great story and one to inspire me, I have always struggled with the anti -intellect thing within AA, you sum this up really well.

Thanks

Adrian UK

Congratulations! I look forward to meeting you there.

Thought it might be time for a brief update as it’s been SEVENTEEN months on TSM! This has been a roaring success. It’s brought about once thought unfathomable change and growth to my life completely empowering me towards its fulfillment in realms both conventional and spiritual. I’ve frankly never felt this good about my path or myself. Ever. So much so that I found myself saying only a week or two ago that even if given the opportunity, despite all the torture and suffering I don’t think I’d do it any differently. In and of itself rather remarkable.

As for the nuts and bolts of it I for the most part no longer drink, but will have something on the rare occasion. For example, the last drink I had as I catalogue this was on Dec 15th at a company xmas party where I sipped half a Manhattan. That’s it! When first contemplating this route and even commencing upon it I would notice that a number of the older guard had simply stopped drinking pretty much if not entirely. I thought it baffling as at the time I so much wanted to simply be normal – something in between. If this is so effective why wouldn’t these people aim for normal instead of what I perceived as the extreme of abstinence? As it turns out I couldn’t appreciate the complete rewiring of the brain that was going to take place. I speak earlier of seeking out a state of ‘cool boredom’ in my interactions with alcohol. It’s indeed feasible and I have achieved it.

I lost about 30lbs when initially beginning and those have stayed off with ease. I also ceased smoking cigarettes seven months ago – not a one since. I’ve joined a gym more recently and am eagerly embracing this path as well. Yoga is back, too. I’ve changed my diet completely as well pursuant of partial vegetarianism, but consistently decidedly healthful choices with great thought and research going in to it. When I began this, I had a most supportive partner whom I’m to this day grateful for and owe a huge debt of gratitude for this achievement, but as a consequence of so much personal growth found myself (and inherently her, too) ill matched for a future together. As such and having begun an exciting, hybrid spiritual path (incorporating daily meditation – wink wink) I asked the cosmos for someone who would share and support similar pursuits and without fail she manifested in my life. I am madly in love and that too has brought about all new exciting potential moving forward. Possibilities once not considered and even outright dismissed are quite viable now.

My acquaintances in AA have really been whittled down to but a few – four with two of those very strained. I still occasionally reach out to help some I’ve met or crossed paths with that are distinctly suffering, but this has proved largely fruitless if not a bit maddening. I’m resolute in my characterization of this program as dark, cultish and fear magnifying so I keep a large birth between it and me.

I’ve to this day never once imbibed either without a tablet or without waiting the required hour. I’ve mentioned in the past some consideration of lessening my dose, but as of yet the risks outweigh the benefits.

NAL on!