6TH MONTH UPDATE!!

So, I just finished my sixth month since starting TSM. The last month was particularly interesting because, as you may have read, I drank multiple times WITHOUT Naltrexone. This was interesting mostly to see the effect a "cure" has on drinking. That is, is Naltrexone a "sober pill" or does it fundamentally change the brain as claimed? I'd say my experience confirms the latter. I drank almost 13 times without Naltrexone, and just 1 with Naltrexone, and I never got drunk, never drove drunk, and never had a super-wild desire for more. My final sessions (last Friday) was interesting. I had planned on not drinking at the sailing club, so I didn't even have a pill. A friend asked if I wanted the rest of her beer because she didn't like it. I hesitated but drank it. Finally, after all these times, I got that wild feeling (not as wild as it used to be) after I finished that beer. I raided the fridge and drank two more beers before calling it quits.

If you read my posts in May, you'll see how I said that TSM "ruined me" on drinking. It was so effective in stopping my addiction that I could barely drink on Naltrexone (which is not what I'm going for). For some of you, this sounds fantastic. For me, it was a bit annoying. So, as I start my sixth month, I'm ready to return to Naltrexone (25mg only), and am confident that my addictive drinking days are behind me.

Overall, in these six months, I've seen a greater than 90% reduction in drinking, ZERO drunk driving episodes, ZERO hangovers of any kind, and really ZERO experiences of being what I would consider "drunk." Here's how TSM has impacted different areas that I spoke of in my original post before starting:

Psych: Much, much happier. Less angry outbursts. No episodes of crawling back in bed depressed in the morning.
Cognition: Better memory. I have read more books in 6 months than the past ten years (sad but true!).
Relationships: Much, much, much more quality time with my kids; no major changes in marriage as drinking really wasn't a big issue (I do miss all the good conversations we had while drinking beer after work).
Job: More income as I am willing to work more nights. I used to NOT work just because I really needed a drink.
Sexuality: In December, I was actually considering visiting a urologist for ED and other issues. HA HA! Not at all a problem anymore. The only problem now is my sex drive does not match my circumstance, if you know what I mean. (High libido is a curse for most contemporary married men).
GI: Was having issues after heavy drinking sessions. No more.
Physique: No changes. Considering I drank tens of thousands less calories with no change in diet, you'd think I'd have lost weight. I'm at my normal equilibrium (BMI 22ish), so not much to lose. I am probably more fit than this time last year, though, because I've been able to work out more.

Thanks for your support, everybody!

I'm interested to see how you get on, my gut feeling is one of fear for you but willing to be proven it's not warranted.

That's sort of funny. I can see how you might think that. My last three nights at home, zero cravings, zero drinks. I don't feel, alcohol-wise, that anything has changed from two months ago (and it has radically changed from one year ago). However, I will promise everyone here (for what it's worth) that I won't drink without Nal, at least for a good while.

Barry,
Isn't it great how we all worry about you? You are a great contributor and I always look forward to your posts. I am so happy for you. Happy Independence Day.
Linda

Thanks. Enjoying my first ever alcohol-free 4th of July in about 26 years. Independence, indeed.
Edit: Wow. Best fireworks show I've ever seen last night. We were so close the ashes were hitting the kids. Lots of families, frisbees, hot dogs, ice cream etc... Nobody in our group had a drop of alcohol, including me. I did dream last night that I was sneaking vodka at the festival, but when I woke up, I was like, "Oh. That was just a dream."

Barry,

You have talked about letting music be a way to let it go (with the thoughts about drinking). This song by Martina McBride has nothing to do with her drinking but I
always think about Indepedence Day as a day of letting go of the "old stuff". I am not as eloquent as you are but I feel such a "letting go" when I hear this song.

Let freedom ring, let the white dove sing
Let the whole world know that today is a day of reckoning
Let the weak be strong, let the right be wrong
Roll the stone away, let the guilty pay it's Independence Day
Roll the stone away
It's Independence day

It's very powerful to me and helps me get out of "the habit" of just drinking. I have
a past of abuse and I thing the drinking became more prominate when that happened. Seeing others break free of the chains of alcohol is as powerful as breaking free myself.

I love you all for being here for us. Even if we don't blog, we listen and believe me, it is powerful.

Love to you all
Linda (trying to get sober)

I'm a country music fan, too. It's funny, because every time I would hear that song I would think about alcohol, too. (Of course, in the song, she just burned down her house and killed someone, but still...). I'd think, "Wouldn't it be nice if I were free from alcohol?" Then, I'd get inspired and decide to quit and. . .nothing. Couldn't stop.