Thanks, Curi. I appreciate your helpful response. And yes, I am concerned about the one in five people who don't respond to TSM, so I'm doing a lot of homework before I dare even think about testing the waters!
I did have a real problem with the helplessness/shaming doctrine of the 12-step treatment I was in, and I really don't want to attend AA meetings the rest of my life. At the treatment center, they told us repeatedly that we would likely fail we didn't go to meetings regularly, get a sponsor, etc. I'm just not down with the cult-like mentality of AA at all. And yes, I do miss wine with dinner and when going out with friends, I'll fully admit

Even if I don't get the euphoric high, the idea of being able to drink occasionally like a normal person is really appealing to me--despite the fact that it involves taking a pill first (I used to always take aspirin before going out, it can't be more of a bother than that!)
You mentioned that cravings get better with time, but the counselors my treatment center said that the opposite is true; as one of them told me, "when you are in an AA meeting, your disease is outside in the parking lot doing push-ups." There were patients in the treatment center who had been sober for 20+ years, and when they relapsed immediately began drinking more than they had decades ago! This is what scared me the most, and why I'm so interested in TSM. I'd be happy to hear if you've had a different experience with cravings improving.
I'm also wondering if I'm reading your last sentence correctly: "Take your time to decide and remember that the longer you are abstinent, the easier it gets and the better it is if you decide to follow TSM." So the longer I'm abstinent the easier it would be if I do decide to try TSM?
Finally, you mentioned that people have going through periods of substance abuse and recovered without AA--I've wondered about this as I know a few people who seem to have done so. My period of chemical dependency was technically only 6 months long--before that I was a regular but non-addicted drinker (never had shakes or even the mildest withdrawal symptoms). Yet I still have cravings now...I guess it only takes a few months of hardcore use to flip that physical dependency switch on. Yikes.
Thanks again for weighing in.
Rhonda
P.S. I am in cognitive behaviorial therapy as well--good call!