Although I have been abusing alcohol to varying degrees for the past 30 years (since college days), it had only become a "serious" problem TO ME in the last two years. I generally have 4 or 5 drinks daily Monday - Thursday immediately upon return from work. Friday night... lookout. The weekends I was at the mercy of whatever party, football tailgate, etc. I could find to binge. I still felt, perhaps irrationally, that this drinking was my conscious choice, which I thoroughly enjoyed, controlled and felt was my entitlement/reward after a hard week of work. I have been blessed to have been very successful in my career and never had my alcohol abuse jeopardize my career. In fact, part of my problem is that the majority of my co-workers and Company owners would probably be classified as alcoholics by most measures, although none of them would classify themselves as that. Drinking truly is part of our Company culture where we begin each Monday morning comparing eachother's weekend war stories with great amusement.

However, things started changing for me a year ago when my wife of 30 years announced that she was divorcing me following the departure of my two children (26 and 22) who had left home to begin their own lives in their own apartments. Shortly thereafter, my dog of 15 years had to be put to rest. The sale of what was our dream home in an unfavorable real estate market was also required due to the divorce, just adding to the stress.

In any case, I began drinking more heavily. Although filed for divorce, my wife and I still lived together cordially until the divorce decree three weeks ago. Over the past four weeks my drinking intensifed such that I would drink continuously upon return from work Friday for every waking moment until Sunday night. Not surprisingly, I developed various stomach ailments and had to miss numerous Mondays to recover.

My family began to express serious concerns culminating in an attempted "one man intervention" by my brother two weeks ago to try to shock me back to sobriety. While extremely mentally painful to me, it did provoke me to take the step to contact a psychologist whom my doctor had recommended. After meeting this past week he insisted that I begin attending AA meetings, which I did last night. Unfortunately, I found it an extremely depressing experience and not at all what I feel is necessary to help me. Of course, I really have not given it a fair chance.

In trying to research and understand my now official "alcoholism" disease I have been pouring over the internet and came across TSM, which has me as excited as I have been in a long time. I plan to speak to my shrink about this today and have every intention of pursing this treatment method. The logic of the method is intuitive and speaks more to the the addictive nature of the endorphin highs which I actively sought through alcohol. Without reversing this addiction which I have developed and nurtured over the past 30 years, I don't see how I can ever be released from the constant temptation that will continue to surround me for the rest of my life due to the prevalance of alcohol in the lives of every friend and family member I have.

I am not yet willing to accept that it is impossible for me to ever experience the warm glow from a glass of wine before dinner with loved ones, as I am now being told. I think this past year has finally brought me to the point where I can willfully discontinue the binge/party drinking in return for the ability to have an occassional drink (i.e. drink reponsibly).

TSM seems that it may be the answer to my prayers. I plan to follow this board religiously and will update as my journey progresses. Thank you to the incredible and thoughtful posters here as I have been given motivation to address my problem which has gone unchecked for far too long.

Welcome Bob_O I'm glad you found us. It's amazing how all our stories sound so much alike! There is hope down the road for all of us on this journey of tsm. Always take your Nal one hour before drinking, expect a little nausea the first few days and you'll go on a honeymoon phase for a short while (less drinking) but that will spike up again I'm afraid. Any questions you have please keep close on the posting. Where here for you

corkit

Welcome Bob
So glad you have found us here. Its marvellous that in the midst of the grief of the loss of your marriage you have decided to take your life in hand. I wish you every success on your journey - hang in here and good luck with your psychiatrist.
SBTS

Welcome B_O - it's always exciting to have a new member - we're so interested in your story - please keep reading and reading. Good luck with your shrink! Keep us posted.

Hello and welcome Bob_O I am a newbie here also, but this board will be so valuable to you in the weeks and months ahead. Be careful when you first take the Naltrexone - it does have side effects for a lot of people. I would start it on a Friday so you have the weekend to begin adjusting. I'm curious to hear how your therapist will respond and whether you'll be able to continue therapy while doing TSM. I think many of us use this board as a kind of therapy, but I'm curious about how being under a therapists care might change or affect the process.

Yes Bob,

Same sentiment as everyone else. I am currently struggling in my marriage and will find out at the top of the year if we survive...

many of our stories are all similar. 2 months ago when I started this program, there would be no way I could think that I might have this licked without extreme craving and AA (member for 5 years). My wife left for out of town this AM for 4 days., I don't have to work tonight. Normally I would've been sucking em down. Instead, I am going to work out here shortly, then I will work in my studio. Yes, I will drink, but I won't be freaking out as I would normally. And hopefully I will keep my units in the 6 range.....

This board is your AA meeting. Unlike AA you can talk on day one and everyday if you want. (some meetings require you to be sober 90 days before you can share) And as a former AA member, if you feel like it, please go to some meetings. There are some good people there.

Welcome welcome welcome, and maybe once your drinking is under control or your abstinent, some folks have found there relationships bounce back. That's what I'm hoping for,..our actions speaking louder than words....Take care, Jim

Welcome Bob-O!

I've been the soul Bob on this forum from the beginning and I welcome a replacement, since I've been de-addicted for many weeks now. Every forum must have its Bob, otherwise the community cannot be complete.

Seriously, I read your story and understand your emotional state right now. I'm glad you recognized the futility of AA quickly and are pursuing a medical solution for a medical problem. This forum acts as a positive reinforcement for you and your friends here as you go through the TSM journey. Our journey is not a never-ending one as is "12-stepping". There is an end. Some call it a "cure"; I prefer the term "de-addicted". It does not necessarily mean that we will be like people who were never addicted. Some are "cured" are now social drinkers only, some nearing abstinence (as I am). You'll enjoy the fact that there is no such thing as a relapse under TSM, just another opportunity to extinguish the addiction. And you'll have folks here ensuring that you always take your Naltrexone 1 hour before any drinking. Never deviate from that rule and most likely your addiction will be eliminated. Even after your addiction is gone, you still must abide by that one rule. But by the time you are free of the addiction, your Naltrexone use will be infrequent, because your drinking will be quite infrequent.

It's hard to believe that your heavy drinking can be reduced so dramatically over several months, but it eventually does happen. Even though TSM made sense to me when I started, I never ever believed it would really work, until it actually did to my great surprise. And there were those depressing days in the middle of the treatment where it seemed that nothing was ever going to change. But it did.

So welcome. Get ready for some comradery, some ups, some downs, some controversy, and ultimately success.
Enjoy your Journey!

Bob

Welcome aboard. Always good to have new people and their views. I too work in a corporate culture of heavy drinkers. A lot of them have some semblance of control, ie only getting trashed on weekends, or so they say. I have not been able to get away from daily drinking.
That being said TSM has been miraculous to me. I have had days where only 3-4 drinks satisfied. Not that I intended them to they just did. That is the difference, not having to force the behavior.
I hope this works for you. Everyone will tell you that patience is necessary. Try not to give in to super high expectations. I say miracle above but a counselor would look at my numbers and drag me to a meeting. But unless they were to do a full analysis of the situation they wouldn't understand that the whole of me, in relation to drinking, has made dramatic progress. And it is changing my life. Just like alcohol causes a vicious cycle of guilt, regret, and physical problems, the opposite cycle is now starting to happen.
Keep posting. you are welcome here.